10 Signs of a Pointless Argument
What would it take for you to realize you’re in the middle of another pointless argument?
In our five years together so far, Kyle and I have had hundreds (thousands?) of stupid arguments. We’ve argued about everything from why he took the good GameCube controller to why my taste in furniture is so “girly.”
When you’re in the middle of one of these arguments, deep down you know that it’s going nowhere and that it doesn’t matter in the long run. But you try to talk yourself out believing that. Here are ten signs that usually point to a stupid argument:
- You’re angry at your husband in general, not just about the issue at hand.
- You can’t believe he doesn’t understand or agree with what you’re saying.
- Deep down, you really want to quit arguing, but that would be much too easy.
- You start thinking that your husband drives you crazy all the time.
- You forget what you were arguing about in the first place.
- You keep asking questions like “When was the last time you did [insert thing you’re arguing about]?”
- You’re arguing just to prove a point.
- You’re looking around for things to throw. (Okay, maybe that’s just me?)
- You start bringing up unrelated things that made you mad.
- You’d be embarrassed if anyone had to witness the argument.
I’m sure you could add your own additions to the list. But what they all have in common, is that they don’t get us anywhere good. None of these signs point towards a willingness to work things out. They’re not out of a desire to serve, nor do they have your husband’s (or your own) interest in mind!
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.”
When you find yourself spiraling into a pit of another pointless argument, don’t strive to keep it going (even if you know you’re right). An argument doesn’t make you right and him wrong, you smart and him dumb. Usually, for us, it’s a mix of both of us knowing we’re in the wrong but being to stubborn to say it, having our feelings hurt, and emotions being too raw to work anything out.
Take a break from it, pray about it, and come back. After some time has passed, you might even just want to drop it.
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