Support His Goals and Dreams
I make a lot of decisions based on fear
I tend to avoid things I am afraid of. This week I decided to face a long-time fear and send it packing. I feel pretty great about it and hope it turns into a new hobby for me and my family. It’s good to expand our horizons and go out of our comfort zones every now and then. I don’t do it very often, and most people who know me, can vouch for that.
You know the kind: The ones who love how horses and leather smell and spend every last dollar on tack and hay. They argue about horse vitamins, and methods, and other people who think they know about horses but really don’t. They wear cowboy boots that are actually dirty and go inside of stirrups. It’s just in their blood, and the thrill of riding overrides any sense of fear.
I wasn’t always fearful. I had my own horse when I was in first grade. She was mean and tried to rub me off on the fence when I rode her. It seemed any other horse I rode, ran away with me or tried to throw me. Maybe I just happened across the horses with bad manners, but it was never a calm experience. I eventually became afraid of horses and decided I was not the horse type. I was clearly a chicken. My sister would get me to gallop, and I would scream my head off, knowing I was going to be flung to the ground and stomped into the dirt at any moment. I avoided letting my kids ride horses because of my own fear. My mom and sister tried in vain to get me to become a part of their crazy-horse-lover-club, but I refused. I watched from the sidelines, but deep down, I also loved the smell of horses and leather.
Recently I found out about a riding instructor. I actually called her, booked a lesson for Autumn, and even went. The whole time Autumn was grooming the horse, I felt edgy. By the time she mounted the horse I was feeling all sweaty. I stood there watching the teacher helping her with good form and proper technique, all the while biting my lip. I felt a little more relaxed and even mildly calm before she was done. The instructor suggested we “care lease” a horse and keep it there so Autumn could have more one on one time with a horse. She said she would be able to ride more and enjoy all aspects of horses, not just riding. I found my head was nodding, and my mouth was agreeing, before my brain caught on and put a stop to the whole idea.
A great way to show love to your spouse is to support their interests and goals
Scott was supportive of the plan. It is a cost-effective way to have a horse, and it would be something we could all enjoy. I really appreciated his positive attitude. It meant a lot to me. He didn’t scoff at the idea or tell me I was being irrational, thinking we could lease a horse. I think I found it more far-fetched than he did. In fact, it always seemed like an impossible feat. But it seemed quite simple. It sort of just fell into our laps. Maybe he wouldn’t have been so open to it a few years back. But now, he just seemed glad I was glad. And that really blessed me.
It might be as simple as riding a horse. It might be cheering them on to finish that degree, play a sport, or learn a new language. Maybe it’s a photography class or going fishing. Sometimes, it’s good to remember to give good gifts to your spouse, rather than just expecting them to carry their fair share of the load. They have little and big dreams. Find out what that might be and help make it happen! I think it’s even better when you enjoy these things together. It will strengthen the closeness and friendship you share.
The idea of riding that horse makes me happy, but Scott’s support adds even more satisfaction to the whole process.
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