If you find yourself stuck in a vicious cycle in your marriage, getting an outside perspective can help. Problems don’t usually arise suddenly. It’s more likely that things have slowly and subtly become bad. We tend to ignore issues until we find ourselves in a miserable situation. Marriage is difficult at times, but brushing things…
Sometimes the smallest things can cause the biggest problems. They tend to add up and spark bickering between spouses. Last week I walked into our bedroom and saw Scott looking all frustrated. “What?” I asked him. He pointed to the scale. He told me I had left it out again right in the middle of…
When we imagine of romance and love, we usually conjure up images of walks along the beach, candle lit dinners, or cuddling by the fireplace. I’ve experienced zero of these scenarios in recent history. We don’t have time for any of that right now. Our lives are more busy than ever, and there is no…
Dear Husbands, I’ve heard from your wife—she needs your attention. She tells me she’s lonely. She feels isolated and ignored. Her life is wrapped around children, work, and/or household chores. She used to feel in love with life, and in love with you, but now she feels worthless and uninteresting. She feels like she’s forgotten…
How can something so wonderful feel so much like an item on a to-do list? The marital sexual relationship is a beautiful part of our lives. It is also one of the most confusing and frustrating aspects as well. It can easily turn into a tug-of-war if you view it as something owed to you—or…
Planning dates can be stressful, right? When you finally get the chance to get out with your husband, you want it to be fun. And sometimes the stress of planning gets in the way of the fun. Last week Scott and I spent the night in Seattle. I had a speaking engagement so we took…
I spend way too much time thinking about all of the things I dislike about myself. It takes up so much mental energy and leaves me feeling frustrated and depressed. It’s pretty selfish if you think about it. Who am I to be so critical? I am made in God’s image so isn’t that enough…
Experiencing tough times together can be beneficial. Family therapist, Dr. C. Allen, says that going through times of crisis or tragedy actually increases the bond between spouses. He explains that this is why it’s so important to work through the rough patches in our marriages. Life can be so challenging, but when you are on…
Change is from the outside in Trying to come up with New Year’s resolutions and ways to improve myself is exhausting. And the only thing more tiring than changing myself, is trying to change my husband. It used to be so tempting. I tried for years, but never succeeded. I finally had to accept that…
Life can be overwhelming. We have recently added four extra kids to our household. My sweet nieces are here while their parents get some things sorted out and settled. This has been a huge change for everyone involved, and has made it challenging to get much done other than cooking and cleaning. We are happy…